Last night, my head hit the pillow at 8pm and I was out in just a few minutes. Little Brady snuggled up to me (Daddy was traveling so he got to sleep in “the big bed”) and the sunset light was streaming in our big windows. It was a little bit of heaven on earth. No cell phones. No tv on. No noise. Just deep breaths and toddler snuggles. It would do us all well to slow down and remember what matters most. Moments like that. It was deliberate and planned and worth every second.
xo,
Emily
Friends! Hi there. Happy Tuesday! Today is Day One. Day One of our 2013 restart here in the Ley House. I can have a restart, right? The past few months have been NUTS.
There’s no better word for it. Nuts. Just plain hard and frustrating and NUTS. I haven’t been myself. I haven’t felt like myself. But slowly and surely as we close chapters on the craziness and hard times that have affected our little family the past few months, life is returning to normal.
See, somehow life happened to us all at ONCE. All at the same time. And it nearly did me in. I started to experience physical symptoms from the anxiety associated with these hard times and that just tripled my worry. Needless to say, that landed me in four doctor’s offices having blood drawn, tests run and a brain MRI performed (one of the most terrifying things I’ve ever done). And as my symptoms mounted, so did my stress. Until yesterday when all results came back normal and I finally realized I was allowing life to get the best of me. Praise the Lord nothing else was wrong but wow did I realize much needed to change.
Thank goodness for really / really / really / good / friends who helped me through a challenging time and thank goodness for verses like this and this that gave me peace at heart while I waded through waters that were murky to say the least.
And now that its all behind us, it’s time to start new. I think that’s incredible that we GET to start new whenever we choose. Thanks, God.
I have a lot of updates and fun news about what’s going on over here. There’s a possibility that Lara and I will be writing a book about business and mommyhood in the coming months. Are you kidding me? Be still my heart. Writing is music to my SOUL. I love it. I crave it. And I don’t do enough of it. Could their be any better topic to share with the world with one of my dearest friends.
The shop is fixin’ to explode with greatness. Five new COLORFUL gold foil prints were added last week. We’ll be debuting a PREVIEW tool on our site where you’ll get to SEE your color choices on personalized items very soon! And our ALL NEW 2013-2014 Simplified Planner will be released in early June! In addition…
… the HOORAY box will come with every Simplified Planner + Simplified Wedding Planner! (more details on this exciting little thing soon!)
… the NEW Simplified Kitchen Planner will be debuted as well! With a large 2″ spine for ALL your mama’s and grandmama’s best recipes!
… the NEW Simplified DATE BOOK (MUCH AWAITED!) will be released also! 12 months (beginning Aug 2013 – Aug 2014) of spiral bound goodness!
… AND the brand spankin’ new SIMPLIFIED PLANNER FREE PRINTABLE LIBRARY! Hooray! Oh, you guys have no idea how awesome this is going to be! Free printables for your Simplified Planner, Wedding Planner or Kitchen Planner!
We’ll be shooting our Simplified Planners tomorrow with Shay Cochrane (and sneaking pics on Instagram! Come join us to see all the new colors!) I’m still in search of a studio space here in West Tampa Bay and we may be riding this next wave of Simplified Planner sales here in my home again, but our sweet friends and neighbors have extra warehouse space where we’ll be storing them as sales begin!
AND… this makes me so happy… I’ll soon be adding a special corner to the shop called “The Pop Pop Shop.” My dad is a master craftsman and has, for years, built furniture and all sorts of things for my family. He’s remarkable, y’all. Well, he’s finally ready to sell a few of his creations and we’ve been debuting his handmade wooden growth charts on Instagram and Facebook. He’s nearly sold all 50 of his first batch (email me if you’d like one of that LAST three!) and we’ll be posting them in the shop soon. Stay tuned! They are INCREDIBLE! (photo below by Michael Newman Photography)
You’ll also notice that our little blog got a facelift! The coaching page and branding pages at the top are also new! Thanks, Aeolidia!
Just for fun, we’re going to have a GIVEAWAY! And in the midst of the madness, I just realized I never chose a winner for the Mobee Magic Mouse! Lori Ellen from Kitchen Doesn’t Travel, you win! :) Email me to claim your prize!
Today’s giveaway – your choice of one of our FOUR new colorful gold foil art prints! We’ll choose the winner at random next Tuesday at noon EST – there are two ways to enter (and you’ll have to post here to let us know you did them so that we can enter you!) 1) follow our page on Facebook and / or 2) follow us on Instagram (@EmilyLey)
Ready, set, go!
Cheers to great things ahead!
xo,
Emily
PS: Photo at top by Gina Zeidler. If you haven’t seen her gorgeous new brand, you’re missing out!
The past thirty days have been the most challenging of my life. One thing after another has hit my heart hard. And today, I woke up and I read these words. I put my running shoes on and I ran outside. I soaked the sunshine into my soul and breathed the fresh Florida air. God is good all the time. I will praise Him in the storm because that is when He is breaking me down to build me back up. This is my new desktop background. Thought you might enjoy it, so I’ve made it a free download here.
You might notice we’re getting a little blog facelift too! :)
xo,
Emily
Wow, I am seriously so humbled and in awe of the response to my last blog post: Infertility, It is well with my soul. Wow. Just wow. It’s unbelievable how many women – how many of YOU – how many of my dearest friends have dealt with this. I’m just amazed at the work God is doing in your lives, and in mine, while we travel this journey. I started a little hashtag on Instagram for anyone interested in sharing their story or journey. It’s #journeytobaby. Feel free to use it if you’re ready to share. I think its so important that we share our stories and support each other along the way. That said, I remember a not-so-long ago time when I (and my husband) was not ready to share. I remember those feelings all too well. Yesterday I had our first appointment of our second month on a high dosage of Femara. Our eighth month (trying to baby #2) on medication. Next month we’ll try IUI for the first time ever.
Thank you SO MUCH to everyone who sent me emails and commented on that post. It touched me to my CORE to know you would have all hugged the crying, flourescent girl in the NC airport. :) No, really, it means so much. I remember being in that moment and feeling so alone. But, honestly, I think God wanted me to sit there. Alone. And cry. Sometimes you just have to sit in the pain of any situation and thank God for breaking you down so He can build you back up.
Thursday, we’re hosting our annual Spring Cleaning Flash Sale in the shop. All kinds of pretties are on sale. I’m excited to clear the clutter (pretty clutter) and get ready for the new products and designs we’ll be releasing this Summer (including the 2013 Simplified Planners, Simplified Wedding Planners and NEW Simplified Recipe Planners). If you’re not on our mailing list – hop on it. You’ll find out first when they are available for purchase. We sold out last year in three months, so get ready!
In the spirit of clearing the clutter and preparing for a great Spring ahead, I’m excited to share with you my NEW favorite desk accessory!! The Mobee Magic Mouse charging station. Guys. Do you know how often my silly magic mouse DIES!? Always right in the middle of a project. Every time. And it. makes. me. crazy. I’m all about simplifying and finding solutions for things that waste time (right?) so discovering this at my local Apple store made my WEEK.
And…. I’m excited to give one away to a lucky reader! To enter, simply leave a note below and give us some feedback and ideas for our new release! We’d love to know what types of paper products would help you as you organize your home and families. For instance: I’m in the process of designing some new printables for the Simplified Planner – and I just KNOW I need one for Birthday Party Planning! Or, we will also be releasing new 8.5 x 11 notepads this summer! I know I could use one or ten of those. Excited to hear what you’d like to see in our new release! Two rules: it must be made of paper and it must be organizational.
HOORAY! I’ll draw a name at random on Tuesday, March 26 at noon EST to win the Mobee Magic Mouse Charging Station!
xo,
Emily
pretty photo at the top by Gina Zeidler
I just got home from Making Things Happen 2013 in Chapel Hill. I have so many things to say and write and process from that amazing conference and 100+ amazing men and women who filled my heart to its brim for two days, but I’ll save that for another day.
Today is a hard day. If you follow me on Instagram, you know I had a very emotional morning. To be honest, it was ridiculously emotional. Out of a movie emotional. I’ve never told my full story, this part of it, here on my blog, but with an inbox full of encouragement and stories and love, I feel like God is telling me that someone needs to hear this. My story is far from finished, but here goes from start to middle.
Bryan and I got married in 2008. We knew we wanted to have children early and often talked about how excited we were to be a Mom and a Dad. Bryan was so excited to be a Daddy. I’ll never forget riding in his truck from our first trip to Disney World when we were dating. We were driving from Orlando to Tampa. And he talked for so long about how excited he was to coach t-ball, attend recitals and make pancakes. He lit up when he told me about this. He told me about the kind of Daddy he wanted to be and I told him about the kind of Mommy I wanted to be one day. It was, and is, my biggest goal in life. I think that was the night we both knew we would get married someday.
About six months after we got married, after our first trip to New York together, we started trying. With no real clue what lied ahead, we started planning and dreaming and focusing on growing our family. Now, if you are a boy and reading this, please note that I am an open book and you might not want to read further about ovaries and cramps and weird girly things. Or, if you can handle it, keep going :)
Around December, about 7 months into our journey, I started having a lot of random pain / cramps during the day. Because we’d had no luck for 7 months I went to my doctor. She ran a few tests and, because of the history of Endometriosis in my family sent us to a fertility specialist to look into the situation. I had an HSG done (where they check to see if your tubes are open) in January which revealed a fully blocked left tube. In fact, my doctor was concerned with “how blocked” it was and scheduled a pretty immediate laparoscopic surgery to remove, what he thought would be severe Endometriosis.
My Mom and Dad couldn’t be here (I thought this was pretty routine, so I told them it was ok for them to stay in Pensacola) but I remember my Mom sending me a special ring that my great-grandmother (and namesake) had given to her. She wrote me a sweet card thats framed in my house – about fear and prayer and God’s provision over the outcome of the surgery. I assumed we’d have the surgery and move on with our attempts to have a baby.
The surgery was short. When I woke up, Bryan was standing over me with tears in his eyes and a funny look on his face. The doctor had discovered a small amount of Endometriosis, but the blocked tube they saw was actually a broken tube – that led to no ovary on my left side. Somehow, I was either born without a left ovary or damaged and lost it as a child. Neither of us were quite sure what this meant but we obviously assumed the worst. We met with our doctor a day or so later and he lifted our spirits. Apparently women with one ovary can still have children as long as the other is functional – which mine is.
Off we went on our merry way to continue trying for a baby. After a few months of no luck, our doctor prescribed Clomid to me (which I not-so-fondly like to refer to as the MOST AWFUL DRUG EVER). I gained 5lbs every month I was on it. It made me sick. It made me angry. It made me have hot flashes. It was terrible. I stopped taking it after two months, ten pounds and a lot of tears. We gave up and forgot about it all, vowing to start again a few months later. Because my cycles were very irregular, I took Provera to start my next cycle. It’s a 10-pill drug cycle that you take once daily to induce your next cycle. I took 1 pill and got nervous that I should probably take a silly pregnancy test even though I KNEW I wasn’t pregnant (and satisfy my odd craving for Twizzlers).
Ten minutes later, I dug the test back out of the trash can. I hadn’t seen two pink lines next to each other, rather one blue line on one end of the stick and one blue line on the other. Of course, because I knew I wasn’t pregnant, Id purchased the cheapest CVS-brand tests and wasn’t sure how to read them.
Pregnant.
I was pregnant.
With Brady Ley. I sat on the floor, stunned and cried. I called my doctor before even telling my husband who was at work at the time, in an absolute panic about the 1 Provera pill I’d taken. He calmed my fears and I took a digital test to be sure.
Pregnant.
I was pregnant.
I was really pregnant.
Tears, high fives, more tears, screams, etc, etc, etc. I’ve never seen my husband so happy. Well, until 9 months later.
My pregnancy with Brady was a story all itself. And so was his birth. In the back of my mind, I knew we’d CONQUERED IT. I praised the Lord every day that we hadn’t had to go the route of the BIG GUNS – IUI, IVF and every other crazy amazing thing that we can do now to have babies, the 1 in 6 couples that has to face infertility in its smallest or largest forms.
As Brady got close to turning 1, we decided it was time to try for Baby #2. And here we are, 16 months later. My doctor tells us he has faith it will happen again soon and all logic points to the facts that 1) we’re capable, obviously and 2) God’s plan is perfect. Writing this out makes me feel silly.
And I think that’s why I’m writing this. For those of you who feel like that, and worse.
See, after three more rounds of unsuccesful Clomid, three rounds of unsuccesful Femara (much better than Clomid) and one newly unsuccesful round of an increased dosage of Femara and supplements for Bryan and I, I just about fell apart in the RDU airport this morning. I was three days late on our first round of increased Femara and supplements. We have “unexplained infertility” (the stupidest, most aggravating term ever) so we’re trying an array of things – IUI being next, after two more rounds of this. Femara is supposed to make your cycles very regular, inducing ovulation on Day 14 – which happened for me this month. One would expect an answer would be found on Day 28 one way or another. But when nothing happened on Day 28 while I was staying in Chapel Hill, I crossed my fingers and my toes. I know better than to get my hopes up. I’ve been disappointed over THIRTY times. Day 29. Nothing. Day 30 (today). Nothing. Then the cramps began while standing in the Starbucks line at RDU. I immediately felt the tears well up in my eyes. I was wearing a bright, flourescent pink pullover too.
So there I was, the flourescent crying girl at RDU today. I sat in a corner, all alone, and cried uncontrollably. I had a bad signal on my phone and couldn’t call anyone. And the only window around faced a loading tunnel. Beautiful. It made it worse. I just sobbed into my coffee. I noticed people around me looking at the silent sobbing flourescent girl, but I didn’t care. I planned to tell them I was crying because I had to leave my boyfriend in NC or something, just something that made more sense than… I CANT HAVE ANOTHER BABY.
I cried in the airport. I cried on the plane. I turned on the song It is well on my iPhone. And I just let the words wash over me. And cried some more. And by the way, I normally don’t cry much about this. I’ve learned better. I know to suck it up and try again. I know that there are more options. But this time… this time…. my heart felt broken. My hopes WERE up. I wanted to tell my husband this AFTERNOON that he was going to be a daddy again. I even knew which shirt I would buy at Carters today to iron the letters B-I-G B-R-O-T-H-E-R onto so Brady could tell my parents when we head home later this month.
It’s not fair. It’s just NOT.
And I think this is the part that hurts the most… this happens to so many women. There are women out there whose arms are EMPTY. (Thank you to my sweet friend, you know who you are, who emailed me today. Your email touched my heart in the BIGGEST WAY). There are women out there who DON’T know the feeling of having a little baby placed in their arms, all warm and pink and FULL of the best things God sends to this EARTH. And I do. I’ve been blessed once. And I feel so selfish asking God for another baby when my prayers have already been graciously answered once. Oh, it makes my heart ache. So many friends are going through this. All at different stages. So many friends have miscarried (Thank you LORD that’s never happened to me). So many friends have lost CHILDREN.
But God is so good. And if I never have another baby. If I never experience that feeling again, it’s ok. It is well with my soul. His grace is sufficient for me. This family I have is MORE than sufficient for me. And His power is made PERFECT in weakness.
I’m not writing to bring tears to anyones eyes, though I bet they are there. After reading this, I hope you go hug that girl who’s silently crying at the airport by herself. You never know what battle she’s fighting. Sarah Teeter, you are a God send and I’m so grateful you hugged me and let me cry and you shared that verse with me this morning.
It is well, friends. It will be okay. Really, it will. Because God is good and at the end of the day, His plan, whatever that may be, is better than ours. If you’re struggling with infertility, know that you are not alone. Know that it does get better one way or another and that the IMPOSSIBLE is POSSIBLE.
xo,
Emily
We are SO excited to offer these lovely “Grace Not Perfection” pencils! Each set comes with 5 hexagonal white pencils with beautiful gold foil letters. These are the perfect accessory to use with your Simplified Planner, or just leave on your desk for daily inspiration!
And, if you need some paper for these pencils, our Desk Pads are now on sale! Quantities are very limited, so grab one before they are gone!
Bryan and I had THE. MOST. INCREDIBLE. trip to the Dominican Republic for my thirtieth birthday. I was on E (crazy eye problems from staring at a computer screen every day type of EMPTY…) when we left. E for empty. I was tired, grumpy, spent, all the words you can think of for EXHAUSTED and DRAINED.
I wasn’t even as excited as I should have been to escape to a tropical island for nearly a week. But the trip was incredible. I hate leaving the little guy just as much as the next Mama, but gracious did I need it. A few days at the spa, many hours (ouch, sunburn) at the pool and on the beach and bottomless margaritas, yes please. Not to mention fun friends, birthday celebration after silly birthday celebration and precious time with my sweet hubby. Lots of fun photos over on Instagram.
I forgot how much I liked him! I mean, don’t get me wrong, I love him to death, but I like him so much! Don’t look at me weird! You know what I mean! :) We had a blast, seriously, and he scored major points with his surprise bottle of wine and birthday cake in our room after a day of snorkeling (ps: panic attack. I hate snorkeling. I can’t breathe!)
Every time I leave (leaving again on Sunday for the Making Things Happen 2013 Conference!) I get super anxious and sad to leave Brady. But every time I return I am so refueled with JOY and happiness and love that I’m overwhelmingly ready to get back to what matters most.
And that brings me to the point of this post. You (yes, you!) stop it. You can’t do that thing (you know the one!) from an empty well!! Hello, Mamas, I’m talking to YOU! You just simply can’t. It’s a matter of physics. Full well = lots of water to give. Empty well = no water to give. Dry. Bone dry.
You don’t have to escape to a tropical island to do this either (although I sure do wish I could!). You just have to remember what FILLS your tank, what FIRES you up. I love reading. I love old literature and good books (Favorites: Love Does (buy it), Paradise Lost (the best) and, most recently, The Power of Starting Something Stupid, by Richie Norton (love you, Nat and Richie). Richie’s a friend of ours – more on his REMARKABLE book later this week. I love taking care of myself (getting outside and sweaty [though I detest it before I'm doing it], massages, pedicures [ok, admit it, you do too!]. I love accoustic music and good wine. I love laughing with Bryan. I LOVE laughing with Bryan :) No one makes me laugh like him. I love being with my parents and soaking them up. I love my girlfriends. I LOVE spending time with Brady.
Today was a long day. It was great, but long. Tonight I decided to take Brady on a date. We went to Surf Shack for Taco Thursday, Starbucks and Target. He was so well behaved (2+ years old and restaurants DON’T always get along these days, but tonight they did!) and said “HIIIII!!!” TO EVERYONE he saw (no, seriously, everyone). And after his bath, I sat down in his rocking chair with him, like I always do, anticipating the 2.5 seconds he’d sit still and then say “Night, night, Mama… pillow” and want to get in his bed. But tonight, he just let me rock him. In silence. We sang a few rounds of Happy Birthday Elmo/Maggie (McKay’s dog)/Daddy/PopPop/Choo-choo, and the Itsy Bitsy Spider then he just settled in and closed his eyes.
You know those moments as a Mom when everything is just so PERFECT and PRECIOUS and you just want time to stop? Then you start trying to shut down any other thoughts that creep into your head? Like the laundry or your work day, or that call you forgot to make for your dog’s grooming appointment? Yea. Oh it was precious. I shut them all down and just rocked. For six glorious minutes. The six best minutes ever. I think they were better than any six minutes I sat on the Dominican beaches with an umbrella’d drink in hand. This is an old photo from when Brady was about six months old, but it’s one of my favorites. Thanks for this Gina :)
And after I put him down and shut the door, I thought… “aahhhhh, my tank is full.”
You can’t draw anything good, ANYTHING GOOD, from an empty well. Fill ‘er up. Do what matters. Ease up on yourself. Soak them up.
xo,
Emily
I don’t know about you, but I’ve been swooning over the iPhone case designs Emily launched a few weeks ago! So much so that I immediately ordered the Emerald Stripe one for my own phone. ( I’m slightly stripe obsessed! ;)) Since then, as orders have come in and the iPhone cases have arrived in the shop, I literally “Oooh” and “Awww” over each one. Confetti. Color blocking. And, my absolute new favorite, Emerald Debutante Stripe. Oh. My. Goodness!
We loved each and every one of these new designs. And, we think you did too. But, well, as much as these cases were beautiful, we kept thinking over here, they were just missing something. They were missing what so many of you love about Emily Ley (besides her enormous heart and infectious spirit)—a little personalization! So, we are excited to announce that these iPhone designs now feature a place to add your monogram! YAY!
Gina
I still can’t believe Brady is two years old. Lately, we’ve found a few products that we really, really love and have helped him really begin to blossom into a little man. My favorite things he’s doing right now are: 1) saying yes ma’m and yes sir, 2) putting together puzzles like a PRO (seriously, it is CRAZY to sit and watch him put together a puzzle) and 3) putting words together to really communicate his big ideas, opinions and feelings to us. The difference between 18 month old Brady and 24 month old Brady is monumental!
Here are a few of my favorite things that are part of our daily routine.
And there you have it! Rest assured I am NOT behind a computer today, rather I am 30 years + 1 day old with my feet up and a pink umbrella’d drink in hand in Punta Cana, Dominican Republic!
Happy Friday, everyone! I’d love to know your favorite toddler tools/toys as well! Goodness knows, us mamas need all the help we can get! :)
xo,
Emily
Watch out! I’m 30 years old! WHAT!! 1983 was a good year.
Part of me wants to kick my heels up and toast the best glass of champagne I can find in my purple sequin dress! (This will be happening later)
Part of me is a tad bit sad! Will I never experience those amazing moments ever again? Walking down the isle to this handsome man. Seeing Brady for the very first time. Really?
But, it only gets better from here. I’m so grateful for all the mistakes, achievements, challenges, friends who’ve stayed, friends who’ve gone, and God’s glorious plan that unfolds day after day. I’m so grateful to be surrounded by so many people who help me be the type of THIRTY YEAR OLD woman I want to be. My word for this birthday is just plain ol’ grateful. Well, that and… CHEERS, Y’ALL!
xo,
Emily
(from the Dominican!)
